Love Bite: A Hopefully Compelling Case for Making Things Nice
Words: Lauren O’Neill
Make it stand out
Something I quite like about myself is that I love having a nice time. Occasionally this desperate drive to only ever be enjoying myself can get annoying – like when I’m dithering over two different kinds of breadstick in the supermarket, wondering exactly which one will be the most satisfying, which is obviously ridiculous. In general, however, it’s good fun to simply decide that even if you’re just sitting at home in front of the TV, you can turn that into an occasion.
Even if I’m just getting in after work, watching whatever brain rot I’ve hyperfixated on that week (currently I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here and I make no apologies), I’ll make an effort for myself. Maybe I’ll put my pasta bake in a cute individual dish and serve it up the way I might if I were having a friend over. It’s good to make things lovely for yourself.
Recently, one of the ways that I’ve been consistently doing this has been via always making sure I factor in dessert. I feel like I like dessert so much that you could call it an actual, hardline ideological position. To me, it’s almost the most important part of the meal, because it’s the only part that is actually fully and totally about enjoyment. As much as food is fuel and sustenance, it’s important – especially if you have or have ever had a stressed relationship with food – to have at least one moment every day where you remember that it’s also really good fun.
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My desserts don’t tend to be particularly grand or even especially large – usually, in fact, I just have yoghurt and fruit, or a small bowl of popcorn combined with some chocolate or mini biscuits (if you’re interested, I’ve tried Malteasers, mini Fingers, Animals, mini white chocolate Maryland cookies, mini Oreos, Magic Stars, mini Smarties, and mini McVities digestives, and after weeks of meticulous research I’d say that the Oreos are probably the best suited to a popcorn bowl, but that’s just my journey). It doesn’t really matter what the dessert is though, really. It’s more just the act of actually having it – preparing it for myself, putting it together, taking a few moments to do something for myself that is entirely just a small pleasure – that makes me feel good. You only get one life, you know.
“I’ve sometimes wondered what it is that has nudged me into my radical stance on dessert, and into a general sense of making things cute and fun for myself for no real reason.”
As with most things to do with my tastes, I think I can put it down to the internet. In some ways, as much as I agree that influencer culture sets unrealistic standards and makes us constantly worry that we’re not living up to some impossible-to-reach ideas of how we should be doing literally everything, I suspect that I might also have it to thank for my preoccupation with showing myself a good time.
If I weren’t inundated daily with videos of meticulously dished-up meals and “air fryer cinnamon rolls”, it’s entirely possible that I wouldn’t be that bothered about doing any of the stuff I’ve talked about here for myself. And as I say, it’s not always possible to copy these examples, nor should we aspire to, because they’re not realistic all the time: I say this as someone who, for breakfast, very much “made: some extremely ropey “tacos” consisting of tortillas and scrambled eggs because that was what I had in the fridge. But if I happen to see someone online who has clearly made an effort with the way their food looks, or who has gone the extra mile with a recipe, I do feel “inspired” to also do that for myself, even if the occasion is just that it’s Tuesday – and that’s certainly one small positive that I take away from the algorithm’s chokehold on the stuff I’m exposed to.
I know not everyone approaches the phrase “treat yourself” as a lifestyle mantra in quite the way that I do – and frankly, sometimes you just can’t be arsed, you make a Pot Noodle, and the treat is just the time you get to spend watching Married At First Sight instead of standing at the hob – but I would recommend giving it a go, just to see how it makes you feel. If you might normally eat dinner late and then head straight to bed, have it a bit earlier and then make yourself a herbal tea, and really sit and savour it. Have a glass of red wine with your lunch on the weekend, if you want one. Quaff it like Henry VIII. Enjoy yourself with food, have a good time – whether that means creating endless popcorn and biscuit combinations, or just spending a little longer making your dinner look pretty on your plate. It’s always worth it and you’ll always thank yourself.
