Love Is Blind, Authentic Connection and How “Clout Chaser” Became the Worst Accusation on Reality TV

Words: Mel Zog

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When Trevor, a former contestant on Love is Blind — a show where participants get engaged without seeing each other — was exposed for having a secret girlfriend during the experiment, it did not go down well. During the reunion, Trevor sat with other contestants as host Nick Lachey called him out in front of a live audience. "We don’t want people coming here motivated by fame, that’s not what this is about," Lachey lectured to Trevor on the unfairness to both viewers and participants, before adding, "When people come here with ulterior motives, we have to call them out. Trevor, you can go now, man." Publicly humiliated, Trevor exited the stage, becoming the emblem of what is most unacceptable on dating shows: not being there for the right reasons.

Reality TV is a paradox, everyone — producers, contestants, and audience — understand that it is fully manufactured television. Yet, in Netflix's dating universe of madness, authenticity remains the tacit contract between stars and viewers. In other words, participants are expected to be on a quest for a pure love; yearning for a soulmate, not Instagram followers.

These shows thrive in part because onlookers want to see themselves reflected on screen. When Love is Blind first aired, audiences were captivated by contestants’ sincere pursuit of a lifelong partner and the fairy tale romances that followed. The sentiment “nothing will ever match season 1” is rampant under #LoveIsBlind. 

The show struck a chord in an era marked by dating fatigue. One where seventy-eight percent of dating app users report feeling burned out. These platforms rely heavily on physical appearance, while Love is Blind offered a beacon of hope by featuring people motivated by shared intentions - connecting beyond looks and having to decide whether they want to commit to each other within a defined timeframe. 

And since Love is Blind sells dreams of authentic connection, the show’s longevity relies on maintaining that illusion. In a recent Variety interview with Love is Blind’s production company, executive VP of casting and talent Donna Discoll addressed casting decisions: "Influencers and actors are off the table. I want people to come in and feel very authentic and raw... With somebody who is an influencer, I’m really hesitant." The message is clear: love and influence must remain as mutually exclusive desires.

Unfortunately for producers and audiences, fame is a likely consequence of a life broadcasted on screen. Anyone with public exposure (and the right agent) can become an internet celebrity worth millions. Contestants know that, regardless of their intentions, they can be rewarded — whether through a surge in social media followers, lucrative brand partnerships, or increased visibility for their businesses. Just look at how former contestants were able to leave six-figure corporate jobs to earn three times their past salaries as influencers.

The early days of Love is Blind, especially its first season, feel like a distant memory — back when the cast knew they were part of a social experiment but had no idea that they would be rewarded so heavily for participating. Now, Netflix's dating universe is an interconnected ecosystem that is gamified to maximise engagement for both contestants and the platform itself. Harry Jowsey, who I'll return to shortly, is a prime example of what years in Netflix’s dating universe can deliver. With 4.5 million Instagram followers and a very lucrative OnlyFans account, Jowsey is a clear example of the opportunities these shows create.

When a system’s flaws get apparent, it's easier to blame individuals. On Love is Blind, the show’s inherent lack of authenticity is often placed on unruly contestants. Reflecting on the Trevor incident, Driscoll remarked, “What upsets me most is that he took the spot of someone who could have been there for the right reasons.” Trevor’s deceit is viewed as an unfortunate incident, a bad apple that slipped through the cracks of an otherwise pure and authentic world — an error that could have been avoided if only the public and producers were better at spotting clout chasers.

In a popular TikTok dissecting the latest season's Love is Blind cast, one user casually claims that contestant Brittany “just wants to be an influencer.” Yet, Brittany never expressed such intentions nor did anything to suggest otherwise. If pressed, the user’s assumption would likely rest on Brittany’s perceived "superficiality"—her long blonde hair, cosmetic enhancements, and desire for a wealthy husband. In the witch hunt for clout chasers, appearances often play a pivotal role in granting women—or denying them—the perception of authenticity. 

“In a social media era where online following is currency, ‘clout chaser’ is the new ‘gold digger.’”

Similarly Jessica, from Love is Blind Season 6, was initially a fan favourite when she first appeared as a single mother searching for love. But when she reappeared on Perfect Match and began dating Harry Jowsey, she was quickly labelled a "clout chaser". Users on Reddit and TikTok dissected her story, claiming she only pursued Harry for his followers. Jessica’s mere association with someone famous subjected her to scrutiny grounded in sexist assumptions about women who align themselves with “high-status” men.

In Perfect Match Season 2, the biggest drama centred around Harry kissing Melinda — another well-known contestant — behind Jessica’s back. When Harry deflected by accusing Melinda of being a "clout chaser" and lying about the kiss to gain from his influence, many cast members believed him. The irony, however, was glaring. Melinda, with her significant instagram following and past appearance as a Netflix host, already had her own clout.

Meanwhile, their male counterparts rarely face such baseless accusations. Ironically, both dramas revolve around the same person: Harry Jowsey. Influencer, superstar, and OnlyFans phenomenon — no one seems concerned with questioning Harry’s intentions, let alone vilifying him for them. In fact, Screen Rant eagerly questioned whether Jessica was a clout chaser, but never seemed as interested in showing the same amount of curiosity for Harry.

These examples point to a clear direction: in a social media era where online following is currency, "clout chaser" is the new "gold digger." Love Is Blind acts as a microcosm of societal biases and instead of addressing its contradictions, authenticity is judged through the lens of gendered expectations rather than definable standards of genuineness. It’s a losing game for women, who are quickly perceived as having deceitful intentions — punished by the audience and, at times, even by fellow contestants.